Valentine Reward Concepts by Love Language + Husband/Spouse Version
1 Corinthians 13:13 (ESV) “So now religion, hope, and love abide, these three; however the biggest of those is love.”
It’s an age-old combat. A husband or spouse’s “love tank” runs dry over the stress and busyness of life, they usually start to sense an ache of desirous to really feel cherished. They hope their partner will do a specific factor or make a sure gesture to indicate that love, however as the times and weeks move, it doesn’t occur. So bitterness begins to sprout, watered by a little bit of resentment and passive-aggressive ways, till a full-blown combat has blossomed.
“I simply want you to indicate me you like me!”
“I do!”
“However you by no means do XYZ.”
“However I did ABC, and also you didn’t even discover!”
You already know. You’ve been there. It’s in the end not a case of 1 partner ignoring the opposite or refusing to fulfill their wants—it’s most usually a difficulty of 1 partner not realizing what these wants are.
Enter the love languages! What I like essentially the most in regards to the love language system, created by Gary Smalley, is that it teaches us to present love in a manner that’s actually obtained by our cherished one. Nothing is wasted! No extra miscommunication, assumptions, or accusations. When every partner acknowledges how the opposite one greatest receives love, it turns into easy to bathe them with that methodology of affection.
1 Corinthians 16:14 (ESV) “Let all that you just do be executed in love.”
Whereas nothing is ever an ideal components, the 5 love languages present an awesome map for expressing our affection. And with Valentine’s Day arising, gift-giving could be difficult on this identical sense. What does your partner really need?
For instance, I like getting trinkets, so I’m naturally inclined to present them! For Christmas, nothing makes me happier than receiving a present that’s custom-tailored to my distinctive preferences and pursuits. This would possibly imply e book earrings, Gilmore Ladies merch, espresso mugs with a present card to Starbucks tucked inside, or collectible figurines from my favourite films or novels (like Alice in Wonderland, The Workplace, and so on.). I like lining these cute little Funko Pop figures on my workplace bookshelves or workstation.
My husband’s worst nightmare, nevertheless, is having a bunch of knickknacks crowding his desk! So whereas I like choosing out one thing enjoyable from his favourite TV exhibits for him to show, it misses the mark with him. The reward I’m enthusiastic about turns into a burden as a result of items are usually not his love language. Nevertheless, he’s joyful once I maintain the flashlight for him whereas he repairs the dishwasher or I accompany him on errands. That’s as a result of he receives love higher as acts of service and high quality time.
See how simple it’s to get confused? I may have my emotions harm as a result of he didn’t reply as I’d hoped to the reward I’d picked out for him—or I may perceive that he’s wired in another way. Similar to I may care much less if he did the dishes or washed my automobile for me, I’d be ecstatic over a Lorelai Gilmore Funko. (That he would simply assume set on fireplace.) Ha!
After we perceive one another, we will present love in methods which can be deeply obtained and assist maintain one another’s “love tanks” crammed—all 12 months spherical, not simply at Valentine’s.
Proverbs 3:27 (ESV) “Don’t withhold good from these to whom it’s due, when it’s in your energy to do it.”
If we actually love our partner, we’ll want to indicate them love in methods they naturally obtain. After we understand it doesn’t work for them, insisting on doing issues our personal manner is just not very loving.
Should you’re not sure of your partner’s love language (or your personal!) right here’s a hyperlink to the free on-line take a look at: https://5lovelanguages.com/quizzes/love-language.
And listed below are a number of reward concepts for every of the 5 love languages—simply in time for the best demonstration of affection this Valentine’s Day:
Phrases of Affirmation
1. Gratitude Journal
Write out a number of belongings you love about your partner, what you assume they’re good at, and so on., in a journal and provides them the e book as their reward. You’ll be able to take it a step additional and decide to writing in all of it 12 months lengthy. They’ll at all times have a spot to come back again to after a tough day for optimistic affirmation!
2. Handwritten Letter
Love letters have been widespread in instances previous for a motive! Pour out your coronary heart right into a handwritten love observe in your partner and wrap it up like a gift. They’ll be touched.
3. Praise Field
Enhance a shoebox, reduce a gap within the high like a home made mailbox, and write thirty belongings you love about your partner on thirty slips of paper. Then every single day for a month, your partner can pull out a brand new slip of paper and be inspired and affirmed.
Acts of Service
1. Do That Chore
You already know the one—the one he’s been avoiding as a result of it makes him drained to even take into consideration beginning it! Perhaps it’s cleansing out the spare closet, organizing the storage, or portray the laundry room. No matter it’s, shock him for Valentine’s Day by getting it executed for him!
2. Wash His Automotive
Shock him by handwashing and detailing his car—in and out. He’ll adore it!
3. Organize for One thing He Hates Doing to Be Dealt with for Him
Should you can afford it, shock the Hubs this V-Day by arranging for one thing he hates to do usually to be dealt with for him, reminiscent of three months’ price of garden care, a subscription to the native automobile wash, and even one thing so simple as committing to take over trash obligation for a month.
Items
1. Meals
In case your partner loves receiving items, nothing beats the reward of sweets, beef jerky, or a number of luggage of his favourite snacks. You will get fancy with gourmand popcorn and treats or just refill on the native gasoline station in your favourite sweet.
2. Customized Stuff
Like I discussed earlier, Funko Pops, merch from his favourite TV present or film, the most recent novel within the sequence he loves, and so on. The sky is the restrict right here, actually! Not solely will he benefit from the reward, however he’ll additionally really feel particular since you selected one thing particular to his tastes to shock him with. Disclaimer—keep in mind, it’s vital to make the items intentional when giving to somebody whose love language is receiving items. Any ol’ last-minute bought current gained’t do. (Neither will one thing costly however random!) It have to be tailor-made to their particular person style and preferences, or the goal will likely be missed.
High quality Time
1. Coupon Guide
Create a booklet with coupons for high quality time collectively operating errands, strolling the canine, visiting a park or museum, and so on.
2. Plan a Day-date
Reward him with an in depth record of a day-date you’ll deal with him to! Or have him block out his calendar and shock him all through the day with every new outing you’ve deliberate. FYI—Progressive dinners (the place you go to 1 location for appetizers, one other location for dinner, and but a 3rd for dessert) are a enjoyable option to make a date last more.
3. Reward Playing cards
Reward him cash to his favourite locations, however bonus—you come included! Does he love Starbucks? Give him a present card with the promise of your organization as a bundle deal. Whether or not it’s visiting a gun vary, his favourite comedian e book retailer, or a restaurant, this reward will present him you’re desperate to spend time with him.
Bodily Contact
1. New Lingerie
There actually doesn’t must be else mentioned right here! ::wink::
2. 30 Days of 30-Second Hugs
Males like hugs, too. In case your partner is blessed by bodily contact, then contact him! A coupon e book for thirty days of thirty-second hugs is a candy—and inexpensive—gesture for acknowledging his want. A half-minute hug can refuel and reconnect you as a pair, in addition to fill his private love language tank.
3. Reward Card for a Therapeutic massage
Not all contact needs to be sexual and even affectionate. A present card for an expert therapeutic massage may actually ease your partner’s rigidity and be a deeply appreciated reward. Or, to make it extra private and/or spice it up, reward him a coupon e book for a number of massages—from you!
Photograph credit score: ©GettyImages/Zorica Nastasic
Initially revealed February 03, 2025.
